Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
