But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I love you. Go after that dick
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
