dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
