Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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