I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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