is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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