can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
