I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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