Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
