Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
