He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
