Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
