Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
