He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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