Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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