I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
