And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize