When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Randomize
