He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize