i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
