Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
