Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
one might say we're banned from that church
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize