Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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