That's when you crack a 10am beer
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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