It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
You left your underwear on the fireplace
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
do nipples grow back?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
