Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
