I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
