I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
