How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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