have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
