i just wanna soil my oats bro
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
