yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
