i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
We don't watch enough power rangers
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
