I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize