There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
