I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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