Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
