I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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