good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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