I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
