That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize