We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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