i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Randomize
