I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I accidentally had phone sex last night
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
