I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
