if you like me you must not know who I am
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize