her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
