Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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