So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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