He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
