I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
