I just made out with a guy for $7.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
